If EVEL is about "fairness", Mr Cameron, I presume we'll be getting all of the following...

1) The Scottish Parliament will be granted the power to unilaterally abolish the Westminster Parliament, as long as 61% of MSPs vote in favour of doing so.  This equalises the current situation whereby 326 out of 533 English MPs (61%) can unilaterally abolish the Scottish Parliament at any time, even if every single Scottish, Welsh and Northern Irish MP votes against.  If it makes the London press feel any happier, we can always put a meaningless platitude into the legislation about how "it is recognised that the Westminster Parliament is a permanent part of England's constitutional arrangements, as long as we stay in a good mood".

2) The Scottish Parliament will be granted the power to veto any constitutional changes affecting England, provided that 61% of MSPs vote for the veto.  Loud cheering is strongly encouraged.  This equalises the current situation whereby English MPs were able to veto Full Fiscal Autonomy for Scotland on Monday night, even though 95% of Scottish MPs voted in favour of it.

3) An English Affairs Select Committee shall be set up as a hybrid Holyrood/Westminster body.  The majority of the members will be MSPs, but don't worry - a substantial minority will be English MPs, one of whom will be allowed to be chairman as a special treat.  There will naturally be just as many SNP MSPs as there are English Tory MPs.  This equalises the current situation whereby just FOUR of the ELEVEN members of the Scottish Affairs Select Committee will actually be Scottish MPs (all of the other seven represent English constituencies), and whereby there will be as many English Tory MPs among the members as SNP MPs.

4) The Scottish Parliament will be allowed to influence the levels of public spending in England.  This equalises the proposed EVEL scenario whereby English-only votes will be permitted on legislation that alters the amount of public spending going to Scotland, via the Barnett Formula.

5) There will be a U-turn on the rejection of a "double majority" system for the upcoming EU referendum, ensuring that Scotland cannot be overruled and dragged out of the EU against its will.  This equalises the current situation whereby Mr Cameron feels that it is intolerable that England should be "overruled" by a UK-wide majority.  It seems that double majority arrangements are not incompatible with living in a "glorious United Kingdom" after all.