A guest post by Glasgow Working Class
First of all, I want to sincerely thank James Kelly for allowing me this opportunity to set the record straight and to very briefly bid you all farewell. I can imagine what a difficult decision it must have been for him after the trouble I've caused on his page.
As some of you know, "Glasgow Working Class" was a persona I created when I was working at Better Together headquarters in 2014. I had several personal problems at the time, and my self-consciousness at being forty years older than most of the spotty teenagers in the building wasn't helping. It was all too tempting to seek the easy way out, and when Blair McDougall went into hysterics after I introduced him to my new character who would taunt Cybernats with catchphrases like "Nat Sis" and "Mein Gott, up yer lederhosen", I saw a golden chance to continue paying off my mortgage without doing any more hard work. I knew Rob Shorthouse would approve. They agreed to pay me £1 for every ten words of trolling on nationalist blogs, with no maximum daily limit. I even got a bonus when I made a Cybernat really lose it. I had genuinely found my vocation.
All good things come to an end, but even when BT was no longer around to support me in the manner to which I had become accustomed, I found that I just couldn't let go of GWC. Far from stopping, or posting less often, I was posting more and more. I descended into a world of fantasy in which I almost became the monster I had created out of desperation. Even during the rare moments when I was "back in the room", I could still hear McDougall's helpless cackles and was convinced the silent majority found my contributions equally hilarious. It's only really been in the last three or four weeks that I've recovered my self-awareness, realised that I am extremely unfunny, and decided to stop for my own sanity and for yours.
To anyone I've hurt, offended or simply bored rigid, I want to say I'm sorry. I truly mean that. You have my word that I will not be posting on this blog again. Thank you for reading this, and best wishes to you all.
Hoots man ra noo we British are still around ye ken ra noo. Scots wae Hae.
Glasgow Working Class was a regular commenter on this blog until April 2017.
Nifty post. I must say that on the occasional lucid post you seemed quite smart. Won't miss your constant crappy posts.James is the man.hope you fare well.
ReplyDeleteVery best wishes in fighting your inner demons. I wish you every success in finding peace in your mind and stability in your life
ReplyDeleteWoh. April 1st. Fell for that one. Oh well
ReplyDeleteYou would thicko. "The noblest prospect which a Scotsman ever sees is the high road that leads to England".
DeleteHardee har har He tries to join in with the joke - that's the funniest bit. He doesn't even realise we've been trolling him all these years. Oh ma sides, ma sides, ma poor wee... mahahaha
DeleteYep. Not laughing with the troll, but at him. James' inspired work confirms him as the site joke.
DeleteC'mon, this addiction is ruining you, GWC.
DeleteOnce we have dealt with this problem we can move onto other areas of your life. Your lust for household pets and farmyard animals and eating their faeces will be the next area we should cure.
See the light, brother. See the light.
Bugger not the Beagle, roger not the rat, don't fuck poor Fido or cum on my Persian cat.
James you are hilarious. And an excellent writer by the way.
ReplyDeleteJames Kelly pretending to be an English racist pretending to be Glasgow working class pretending to be anti-independence. And I'm not entirely convinced JK is real.
DeleteVery good James
ReplyDeleteWell, I for one am sorry to see you go, GWC, April Fool or not. No other poster so succinctly summarises the fundamental idiocy and nastiness of the Unionist position. The satire was so telling that for a long time I though 'GWC' was actually a James Kelly alter ego, especially when he very pointedly refused to block you from commenting.
ReplyDeleteDon't we wish it was true. Being spared the troll's casual racism and brainfarts... How wonderful...
ReplyDeleteVery good...
ReplyDeleteIt says a lot about the morals of Bitter Together that they would sink to such depths of skulduggery. I hope you move over to yes after seeing what the Brits are really like. But I won't hold my breath.
ReplyDeleteClassic James.
ReplyDeleteI know it is April Fools Day but I hope it is true. :)
ReplyDeleteMagic
ReplyDeleteI dread to think what sort of mindless waffle we are going to be subjected to from New Direction "activists".
ReplyDeleteThe mrs just back from Glasgow says there must be a nationalist rally on. I asked how do you know! She said there are a lot of weirdos hanging about the station.
ReplyDeleteHere's GWC's love song for its Tory overlords:
Deletehttps://youtu.be/vwmU343eBu0
You don't have a "mrs"
DeleteThat's what other people call a "nurse"
Same thing ya numpty she fondles me on request,
DeleteHere's GWC's love song for its Tory overlords:
Deletehttps://youtu.be/vwmU343eBu0
She doesn't "fondle" you.
DeleteThat's what other people call a "restraining grip"
That would be a home game at Ibrox then...😉
DeleteLove it! hahahaha
ReplyDeleteHuntae gowk!
ReplyDeleteHaha! Good April fool. But for an even better one you could just have put up a post saying that Scotland subsidises England and would be better off out of the UK as part of a federal Europe ;0)
ReplyDeleteEat your cereal.
DeleteHere you go, Aldo! Scotland subsidizes England, and we would be better off out of the UK, which doesn't have the slightest clue what "federalism" is, and as part of a Europe in which we would have as much say in the running of our own affairs as Malta (pop. 420,000), does over its. We would also have our shot at holding the Presidency of Council of the EU, a slot currently held by Malta (pop. 420,000).
DeleteAs an independent State, Scotland would also, and obviously, have a great deal of say over its dealings with the EU and with the Westminster Government. Right now, Malta has more say than Scotland does over both, because in practice and actuality we have no say at all in either.
We do not have to ask the EU for permission to hold a referendum, but the Westminster regime thinks that we have to ask it, and that it has the right to say "no" - in defiance of international law, by the way. According to Westminster doctrine, the sovereignty of the UK parliament is absolute (except when the Prime Minister uses the Royal Prerogative, presumably), and the British constitution is famously unwritten, so nobody knows exactly what's in it. The EU's powers are tightly circumscribed, and are set out in black and white in the treaties for everyone to see who cares to.
Oops, it's after midday so that wasn't an April fool after all - sorry to disappoint...
April is the cruelest month - especially on the 1st.
ReplyDeleteMeanwhile the so-called united kingdom continues to disintegrate and it's britnats doing the most damage - which is nice.
Gawd, you had me going for a minute there, James - until I remembered the date. Brilliantly done! Well worth being an April fool over.
ReplyDeleteOh, but would that it were true... I wouldn't miss the smelly brainfarts either.
I suspect I'm the vile cybernat who lost his cool. Well, that's what grumpy old sods like me tend to do, especially without coffee.
I don't see the humour in this. My pomeranian is a rape survivor and GWC is the perpetrator.
ReplyDeleteDo not legitimise this freak. He has a room in his house which is a cross between a sado-masochistic dungeon and a petting zoo. He has committed great crimes against the animal kingdom. He is a monster who should be locked up.
Yer dug is a Leslie Riddoch lookalike then.
DeleteUnnatural monster! You admit it!
DeleteMy little Fluffbobbles is not your chewtoy! Disgusting beast! Filthy repugnant swine! Burn in Hell!
Pretty good April Fool's joke, James. The sad thing is there is probably a kernel of truth in the origins, but the best jokes have a touch of truth in them.
ReplyDeleteKnickerless announces trip to the USA the day after the 1st of April. Very tactful.
DeleteShe will take the case of independence to the Yanks but mainly it will be trade and commerce. Will the EU allow that! Will the Tonald be allowed into Scotland!
Here's the April Fool's joke's love song for its Tory overlords:
Deletehttps://youtu.be/vwmU343eBu0
So Jersey looks as if it will join the leave stay club. London next?
ReplyDeleteWell there we have it. An Anonymous commenter (not me) , not realising the it was an April fools joke, makes the following comment. "Very best wishes in fighting your inner demons. I wish you every success in finding peace in your mind and stability in your life" A kind, compassionate and civilised post. GWCs response? A childish insult followed by a quote from someone much wittier than he could ever be. It says it all really.
ReplyDeleteDoes not take long tae drag you nat sis oot the cupboard. Just sittin there waiting ya fash mugs.
DeleteThe Tory crap is wearin thin. The punters are twiggin tae yer Tartan Tory Thatcherite policies. But do carry on with your lies.
DeleteAnd how much does Scotrail give to the Dutch Government, Tory bhoy!
GWC is none other than the exiled war criminal Hubert Pupilieber. The depraved nonagenarian Nazi was notorious in the Reich for his attempts to cross-breed Aryan males with the German Shepherds.
DeleteYou must have been that wee lickin dug the Queen Maw stuck doon her drawers tae help her smile and waive.
DeleteMeanwhile the guardian is still pumping out the lies. Apparently a bridge which was due for completion in June 2017 is now 9 months late and due to be finished in July 2017. They really do need exterminating.
ReplyDeleteI read this today for first time and thought, wait.., what? Then I thought, 'Oh, the poor thing', but wait.. then I thought, 'April Fool'! Then I thought, paraphrasing the wee lassie's love for the young George Bailey, in 'It's a Wonderful Life' 'I'll love you, James Kelly til the day I die'.
ReplyDeleteThat was absolutely brilliant. Thank you.
Then you licked your ice cream cone and life became a reality.
DeleteHere's the April Fool joke's love song for its Tory overlords:
Deletehttps://youtu.be/vwmU343eBu0
Chris AddisonVerified account @mrchrisaddison 2 hours ago
ReplyDeleteThis government does at last give the lie to the idea that privately-educated Oxbridge graduates are especially bright.
The Nat si intelligentsia seem incapable of providing a Scottish currency and a viable economic plan. They cannot plan a cohesive integrated public transport system.
ReplyDeleteForget about Oxbridge. This is Scotland.
Good one, James. I didn't read the piece until 2nd April so I wasn't "on guard" and I was nearly at the end of it before the penny completely dropped. Exactly as it should be!
ReplyDeleteMichael Gray @GrayInGlasgow 7 hours ago
ReplyDeleteTheresa May: 'Respect self-determination in Gibraltar.'
Spain: 'Now is not the time.'
#Brexit #ScotRef
Knickerless over in California making climate deals. The Spanyards will not now oppose Jock entry to the EU. EU using Gibralter as bargaining tool and no doubt Knickerless will support this.
ReplyDeleteTrump to attack N Korea. Exciting times and the nat sis cannot come up with a Jock currency.
braindead yoon zoomer lololol
DeleteAnd the braindead nat sis need a mention for the sake of fun and laughter.
DeleteMe de stellafella, me want my own topic like de glasgow working class yay
DeleteHappyToast ★ @IamHappyToast 6 hours ago
ReplyDeleteThank goodness we've got a level headed expert in diplomacy to solve these sensitive issues and calm things down #Gibraltar #Boris #Twit
The UK is to seek a massive refund from the EU mafia before Brexit. Moanin campaign to resume on return of Jock FM from the USA.
Deletejoe kane @joe90kane 8 hours ago
ReplyDeleteThat Royal Navy icebreaker should come in handy against the only country in Europe with a desert.
Scott Reid @scottreid1980 10 hours ago
ReplyDeleteMeanwhile at the Russian Embassy...
Russian Embassy, UKVerified account @RussianEmbassy
Lord Howard: Please don’t start the war with Spain before we finish the breakfast tea. #Mondaymotivation
An International laughing stock days into the article 50 process.
DeleteGreat job you witless bunch of westminster bubble twats.
PMSL!
HappyToast ★ @IamHappyToast 6 hours ago
ReplyDeleteThank goodness we've got a level headed expert in diplomacy to solve these sensitive issues and calm things down #Gibraltar #Boris #Twit
Knickerless changes knickers before returning home fae the USA tae Scotland with a promise tae resume with Tory policies and change her knickers. Scottish wummin will be given free knickers on prescription in a new radical policy initiative.
ReplyDeleteHas anybody else noticed that the 1713 Treaty of Utrecht is sacrosanct and must be honoured forevermore while the 1707 Treaty of Union and all those articles protecting Scots law, church, mint, taxes etc can be ignored?
ReplyDeleteAlso anybody pointing out that the 1707 treaty would mean an independent Scotland inheriting 50% of all current UK memberships, treaty obligations etc is told that history doesn't matter because reasons.
I travelled through Utrecht once and did not notice much. She was not very exciting.
DeleteScottish nat sis to support Spanish claim for Gibraltar and removal of British from the Falklands. Major speech expected from Knickerless on return from the USA and her change of knickers.
ReplyDeleteScott Reid @scottreid1980 10 hours ago
ReplyDeleteMeanwhile at the Russian Embassy...
Russian Embassy, UKVerified account @RussianEmbassy
Lord Howard: Please don’t start the war with Spain before we finish the breakfast tea. #Mondaymotivation
joe kane @joe90kane 8 hours ago
ReplyDeleteThat Royal Navy icebreaker should come in handy against the only country in Europe with a desert.
Knickerless refused exit from the USA due to hygiene issues and not meeting EU standards.
ReplyDeleteThe medical term for not being aware of one's deficits is anosognosia, or more commonly known as a lack of insight.
DeleteHaving a lack of awareness raises the risks of treatment and service nonadherence.
Individuals who deny having an illness may be against seeking professional help because they are convinced that nothing is wrong with them.
Disorders of self-awareness frequently follow frontal lobe damage.
You the above impersonator may have Munchausen' syndrome or DPD.
DeleteYou require Obama Care.
Jamie RossVerified account @JamieRoss7
ReplyDeleteYou have to admire, in these concerning times, how dedicated the UK has become to making the rest of the world piss itself laughing.
I use Viva all in one disposable nappies you can get them online for £8.99 for 28. they are excellent for men with heavy to severe incontinence.
Deletethe problem is the dribble stains my troosers, thats why I prefer the nappies. With my enlarged prostate its difficult to determine when Im finished
DeleteShhh!!! Can you hear that? Shhh....listen!
ReplyDeleteI think it sounds a bit like......a bit like....
....an independence referendumb!
....in 2036! ;0))))
"The undecideds and the bottlers will put it in the back of the net for 'remain'. I'm sure Cameron also has a few tricks up his sleeve to deploy in the dying days of the campaign."
Delete'Aldo' Vance
The DM Reporter @DMReporter 47 minutes ago
ReplyDeleteTOMORROW: Free crucifix shaped Easter egg with Union Jack decoration, made from 100% non halal pig fat and hand finished by Nigel Farage.
Knickerless signs climate deal with a Yank but they do not explain what they wish to achieve besides wasting paper.
ReplyDeleteIs it just me or has it been very quiet recently on any sort of polling ?
ReplyDeleteWe have local elections just around the corner and no recent poll results on those.
Also, I haven't seen any credible polls fully conducted after Emperor May announced that now was not the time.
Whats going on ???
There'll be plenty of polling getting done - none of it Yoon-friendly and therefore unlikely to see the light of day...
DeleteJock nat sis have now added Spain tae their crawling list. Oh how you fash hate the English.
ReplyDeleteHey fascist you are like Adolf. Contstant repetitive drivel.
DeleteAre you related to Ken Livingstone by any chance?
Why are you obsessed with the First Minister of Scotland's knickers Carlotta Vance?
DeleteWee Knickerkess is now inviting the Tonald tae Scotland. Big U turn considering her fash MP'S were wanting to ban him. Nat si hypocrites. Gies ye a larf.
ReplyDeleteEven the Jock fash fundamentalist Nat sis are shiting themselves fae haudin a referendum.
DeleteThe colostomy bags are full and choking the scumbags. The smell and wind phew!!!
Frau Knickerless wee shmellie fishy drawers tae sell out Scotland tae ra German Nat sis and the Herman Frankfurt bank.
DeleteHoots man ra noo we Brtitish are still around ye ken ra noo.
We have won the argument that is why yer erses are nippin. Call the referendum Nat sis.
DeleteWe have brexit, we are treating Knickerless with contempt like the frumpy numpty she is and she will still not call it.
Jock bottle merchants. Up yer lederhosen.
The impersonator from 10:26pm clearly has nothing to offer. Just repetitive comments.
ReplyDeleteDo try sad sack.
Rape Crisis Scotland @rapecrisisscot Apr 6
ReplyDeleteRead why @rapecrisisscot and @scotwomensaid won't support the inhumane & unworkable family cap & #rapeclause here https://tinyurl.com/m933mwk
And their Tartan Tory pals. Less you forget nat si.
DeleteWee Knickerless now pally wie Obomber and the Tonald bomber of Syria.
Knickerless draps the referendum drawers already gone..... Perr wee thing.
ReplyDeleteAre you on a record breaker repetitive post competition?
DeleteAlthough, of course, this classic also illustrates the nature of the troll's relationship with its Tory overlords:
Deletehttps://youtu.be/uiaAfd0_EdM
Rape Crisis Scotland @rapecrisisscot Apr 6
ReplyDeleteRead why @rapecrisisscot and @scotwomensaid won't support the inhumane & unworkable family cap & #rapeclause here https://tinyurl.com/m933mwk
Frank Zola @mrfrankzola
ReplyDeleteTories confirms pensioner back door bedroom tax of £1500+ per year
https://speye.wordpress.com/2017/03/14/tories-confirms-pensioner-back-door-bedroom-tax-of-1500-per-year/ …
Tory leader Ruth Davidson was quizzed on policies stating she would introduce a graduate charge of £6,000 for a four-year degree and prescription charges of up to "about £8".
ReplyDeleteRoddy Macdonald @Logicsrock 3 hours ago
ReplyDeleteGassing orphans is wrong says woman who prefers to starve them http://rochdaleherald.co.uk/2017/04/07/gassing-orphans-is-wrong-says-woman-who-prefers-to-starve-them/ … via @@RochdaleHerald
Paul Kavanagh @weegingerdug Apr 7
ReplyDeleteCoercing rape survivors to disclose their abuse
Stripping benefits from bereaved families
This is the shameful obscenity of Tory Britain
Paul Lewis @paullewismoney Apr 6
ReplyDeleteDWP says rape clause for 3rd child benefit was 'widely consulted on' https://goo.gl/iglTvM but almost every respondent said don't do it!
Its all gone very quiet James, just as well a weeks not a long time in politics. Lt Frank Drebin springs to mind "Move along, nothing to see here"
ReplyDeleteWee nippy, the fat fuhrer and the march to westmonster.
ReplyDeleteFat fuhrer: Right. Here's the deal. Thon Tory wummin isnae gonnae gie us wur indyref twa. So wer gonnae March tae London from Glasgow and DEMAND it!!!
Wee nippy: Aww that's a brilliant plan!! Lead the way ya sexy beast!
John Swinney: Walking from Glasgow to London?? Oh feck!
Ten mins later.
Derek McKay: Ur we there yet?
Fat fuhrer: Naw! Shut yer squeaky wee voice an keep walkin!!
Two hours later.
Wee nippy: Aww naw, ma feet ur killin me! Surely that's us in London noo?? We must've walked aboot a hunner mile!
Fat fuhrer: Naw. Wur in East Kilbride. Keep marchin! Aww look, there's East Kilbride shoppin centre. There's a McDonald's in there! An a pizza hut tae! An a Bella Italia! An a Chinese! An a chippy an aw!! C'mon troops, a quick detour.
Jim Sillars: Yer a disgrace Salmond. Yer only a patriot when yer no eatin. Ah'll be votin no in yer referendum so ye can stick yer independence up yer hole. God save the Queen!
Anyone else remember when Aldo conducted himself with grace and good humour? I miss that.
DeleteWhy are you obsessed with the First Minister of Scotland's knickers Carlotta Vance?
DeleteJock fash to march on London. 1000 volunteers wanted preferably overweight and not claiming benefits.. Organiser's still awaiting volunteers.
ReplyDeleteAlthough, of course, this classic also illustrates the nature of the troll's relationship with its Tory overlords:
Deletehttps://youtu.be/uiaAfd0_EdM
30% casualties expected by the time they reach Echelfechan pies and bridies with mushy peas and Bovril to sustain those who march onwards tae Carlisle.
DeleteDWP to set up signing oan desks en route. Individual hard done tae stories under the English will be documented for posterity.
Why are you obsessed with the First Minister of Scotland's knickers Carlotta Vance?
DeleteI like hingin ma wives knickers oot oan the washin line.
DeleteTrolls, you got to love em. Have pity extinction looms.
ReplyDeleteThey're already being extended all the pity they deserve, given their hysteria, insults and near-total lack of willingness to engage like adults.
DeletePerr wee Jock Bishop Wishart whit a loser.
DeleteQED.
DeleteGWC2 you have a mental health problem and need help.
ReplyDeleteIn other comedy troll news. I see that disgusting bint HolyroodMandy accused @politicsScotland of Mansplaining at her. Following on from her pathetic attacks on the Rev Stu isn't it time that bigots like her were confronted by the SMSM as the sexists they are?
ReplyDeleteNever heard of the bint until now. She lives in Scotland. The rev stu pid lives amongst the people he hates! Kind of like an islamist infil traitor. Those English are so moderate. Takes a lot to waken them up.
DeleteAnother GWC love song for its Tory overlords:
Deletehttps://youtu.be/uiaAfd0_EdM
Have you given up on the Cox and May repetition. Found a new one and you are kicking the erse out of it.
DeleteKnickerless is flexible on a referendum. Kim Jung Eck claims to speak for the Scottish people. Whit a wee knob he is.
ReplyDeleteThe troll calls scottish people "jocks", advocates arming Leave campaigners and arbitrary deportations, claimed Jo Cox's husband was a fascist, uses racial and ethnic slurs while claiming they're not pejorative, pretends to be Labour (badly) while espousing far-right racist hate-speech, praises Theresa May and the tories and displays a perverted poisonous obsession with Scotland's First Minister & her predecessor.
DeleteNow away back to the Dreary Heil before daylight burns you.
And he's back! I must admit, for a while there I thought James had broken you, GWC2. I thought; "that's it, he's finally done it, the poor wee fella's been spanked and roasted so hard this time that he must be sitting in his bedsit with a face like melted cheese." Because, let's face it, a man can only take so much. Once you've opened yourself up to as much ridicule as you have it's only natural that a man might become "dysfunctional" - it's your life generally I'm talking about here, not your chap. Although, having said that, it's probably the first thing to go south, isn't it. It's probably drooping there right now, isn't it, like a stringy sliver of under-fried bacon fat. But no! He's back, he's here, and he's awesome! I'm duly relieved. People need to experience total pish to give perspective to their lives. It lets them know that they are in fact normal. Plus we get to keep roasting you, only now we know that you're indestructible, and you enjoy it! GWC2 loves it up 'im!
ReplyDelete