Would-be hostage-takers demand "input" on whether they should have the legal right to hold you hostage (after all, they are "stakeholders" in the outcome)

My calendar seems to have gone seriously awry this year. I could have sworn it was September 26th, not April 1st...

"People with an Ulster Scots background should be allowed to vote in Scotland's independence referendum, a senior Orange Order member has said.

Dr David Hume said Ulster Scots had played a key role in Scottish history.

"We are stakeholders as well. Surely a decision such as this should not ignore our input?" he said."

Fair enough, David. And in line with this principle of genetic inclusivity, I'm sure you'd agree with me that everyone of Scottish descent in the United States, Canada, Australia and New Zealand should also be allowed a vote in the referendum. I dare say we can all guess how that would pan out. Oh, and naturally anyone of Irish descent in Scotland (ie. me and hundreds of thousands of Celtic supporters) should be given a say on Northern Ireland's constitutional future.

No objections, I take it?