Tuesday, March 17, 2015

If only you had listened to Jackanory Jim, things would have been much the same

Mark Coburn suggested tonight that Scottish Labour's Twitter account seemed to have been hacked, and I think I've spotted what he means.  Even by the conventional McDougall standards of stupidity, this tweet is very, very stupid indeed...

"Salmond told people to vote against Labour in 2010 and the Tories ended up being the largest party."

Hmmm. The snag here is that Salmond may have given that advice (if "vote against Labour" can be considered a legitimate longhand version of his actual "vote SNP" message), but Scotland didn't take that advice. Labour got more than twice as many votes in Scotland as the SNP did. Result? Not only were the Tories the largest single party at Westminster by miles, but David Cameron was the new Prime Minister.

Now, to be fair, a minority of people (20%) did take Salmond's advice. But let's suppose every single person in Scotland had been a good little boy or girl, and had voted Labour in the way that nature intended. This is what the result would have been...


Conservatives 306
Labour 276
Liberal Democrats 46
Others 22


So the Tories would have been the largest single party by a comfortable margin, and would have formed a coalition with the Lib Dems. Exactly the same as what actually did happen. This means, of course, that it was quite literally IMPOSSIBLE for anyone in Scotland to prevent David Cameron becoming Prime Minister, no matter how they voted.

Perhaps Labour could explain their theory of how Alex Salmond was personally responsible for the 2010 result in a little more depth? I'm sure we could all do with a laugh.


  1. Och you are being silly, Mr Kelly. You must know by now that Alex Salmond is personally responsible for every bad thing that happens anywhere, ever. It really is that simple, you know.

  2. I know I'm far from being the only person who reserves in his heart a very very special place - assuming things go swimmingly in May - for the moment of intense joy that will come when I imagine B McDougall's face as he watches one Labour rat after another drown in the SNP deluge....can the putrid smugness really be maintained?

  3. Why do I let these things get to me. I mean, I already know the diabolical nature of the Torygraph, but still: SNP: 'We have right to dictate policy for all Britain' (yes, the actual headline) (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politics/SNP/11474873/SNP-We-have-right-to-dictate-policy-for-all-Britain.html). They just can't help themselves. The use of quote marks disturbs me. No one in the SNP has said any such thing. They're so desperate to poison English public opinion because they're shit scared of a progressive turn in UK politics. Deliberate and concerted efforts in the msm to create division within the blessed union. Oh well. Not for the first time, I'm struck by the fact that it's the Nats who behave in a far more "British" way (I'm referring to the idea, however untrue it may often be, of "British fair play" etc) than self-proclaimed arch-Brits in the msm who are just utter scoundrels. And yeah sure, I'm glad that the end of the British state is approaching (that's how it feels) but it really, really saddens me that it has to end with such bile and racism from so many unionists.

    1. "They just can't help themselves. The use of quote marks disturbs me."

      Hmmm. That is a bit dodgy. On the plus side, it opens the floodgates for the rest of us.

      Shock confession from Telegraph editor : "My sordid night of passion with Samantha Cameron"

  4. Chuckle...indeed. Or how about "Sillybland* rules out even glancing at evil Nats out of corner of his eye!"

    *ok, might not be as good as the porcine 'Little Ed', but it's mine and I'm keeping it!

    1. Careful there JK, you wouldn't want to inspire headlines, let alone a McDougall tweet, along the lines of "Notorious cybernat blogger slanders popular S Cameron with claims of secret orgies with up to 500 attendees"

  5. YouGov sub-sample: SNP 37, Lab 28, Con 23, Others <6.


    Towards the lower end of SNP scores, but nothing out of the ordinary really. Looks like a Tory-heavy sample because the approval rating for the UK government is unusually high.

  6. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politics/labour/11476979/Facebook-partly-to-blame-for-Labour-woes-in-Scotland-says-Douglas-Alexander.html

    Wee Dougie.

    1. A shoddy workman blames his tools.

    2. Poor Dougie. Poor Red Tories.

      How on earth will they counterbalance all those Nat lies and distortions on Facebook? Will no mass market newspaper or state broadcaster take pity and give these poor voiceless souls some support from time to time?

    3. LOL! Alexander is a chancer, a New Labour careerist who appears to believe in fuck all, beyond his own career and status of course.

  7. I have been struggling to understand the Labour manifesto, which, so far, appears to be vote SNP get Tory.

    How does that work exactly?

    They are, within any reasonable political orbit, miles apart.

    Let's say that the Conservatives did have a majority with the support of say UKIP.

    What are labour going to say then? The more accurate 'vote UKIP get Tory heavy' or what?

    If there is a division in Scotland it is between parties of the left and the erstewhile Labour Party.

    I think I am right in saying that a vote for either Labour or the SNP in Scotland makes no difference to the outcome in the UK GE. Both parties, I am less sure about Labour, would find it next to impossible to work with the Eton boys.

    So we could vote for all MP's to be Labour or all MP's to be SNP and it wouldn't change what the Tories do. Apart from, maybe, the PR around it. What it might mean in a Scottish context is a different matter entirely.

    And we all know where that landed us. A smirking David Cameron on the steps of 10 Downing Street.

    I don't know about you, but I found that insufferable.......

    The point of the SNP is independence from this theatre or the absurd. I hope they never forget that......

  8. We have this bizarre and surreal on-going spectacle of Jim Murphy and Kezia Dugdale endlessly lying about the largest party forming a government at Westminster. It has been categorically debunked and dismissed, and yet the two above keep on repeating it like they have been programmed too in a Greg Moodie cartoon. This is what Scottish Labour have been reduced to.

  9. @ Muttley79,

    Have a look on Wings mate, the Rev has a clip from his part on the Kaye show in which he discusses this and tells the BBC they should be calling Labour out for their lies.

  10. @Patrick

    Yeah, I saw it.

  11. TNS online poll of GB, including DKs, has sub-sample of SNP 36, DK / Prefer not to say 19, Lab 17, Con 10, Green 8, LD 6. I don't see a page excluding DKs giving a Scotland breakdown. Manually adjusting it gives SNP 45, Lab 21, Con 12, Green 9, LD 8.

    Bit unusual for a TNS poll in that it shows a small CON lead. Most of their polls (both GB and Scotland) have been more favourable for Labour.